A few things that have been troubling or have always troubled me:
Is anyone else completely incompetent when it comes to folding a newspaper back to its original state. I attempt to fold it, then get flustered and leave it in a giant piled up mess on the table. That is why, I have given up all efforts to read the newspaper. If I need to be informed, I get my information from collegehumor.com, because its always accurate and folds up neatly on your computer screen.
I am also finding that I am unable to obtain credit cards from stores. I attempted to apply for the Victoria Secret card, all so I could get free underwear, but alas, as usual I was not approved. You can't get a credit card with out credit, but how do you get credit then if you can't get the card? I will now try applying for a shell credit card, hopefully it will work out. Who knows!
Also, it appears that NC hwy 55 has become the hub for homeless beggers. But they also seem to be wearing those reflector vests. Do you think the state stepped in and said, "Look sir, you can badger all the people you want for money, but you will be doing it in a reflector vest. We don't want any lawsuits on our hands, where you'll get money just because you got hit." I hate that sad look they give you and if they have half a limb, they really try to play it up by limping really badly. I don't carry cash on me, and very little change, there is nothing I could give them. If I had food, maybe I'd give it up. But I'm not going to give to some man on the street, when I don't know if my money really will go to his starving family or his starving appetite for alcohol. So when I do decide to hand out money, it will be to charity. Because those people really can get a job, (unless they have psychological disorders, which I understand is about 50 percent of homeless people), because I have a friend who lives out of his car by choice and has a job, dresses fine and is sanitary, he finds ways to make it work and he has plenty of money now.
I don't understand those erector set like spoilers on the backs of shitty cars. It looks so dumb. Its obvious its been added to the car. Its never on nicer looking cars though, its on beat up hondas from the 80s? I want to know what the appeal is.
Finally, I am pissed with Beyond Fitness. I have been mad now for about a week and a half. They closed the Wavery Place one because they got evicted since they dont pay their rent. And everyday that I go to the NW maynard one, they tell me ohh they'll be opening in (insert three days ahead of what day it is). Finally they said that they will be opening tomorrow or today. Tomorrow being the latest that it will be. But I'm willing to bet, that when I go to the maynard one, that they will tell me its not opening now till Saturday. Fuck you Beyond Fitness.
That is all for now, gotta get back to play literati at work.
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Fulfilling your daily requirement for cynicism, pessimism and sarcasm since 2006. Weekly rants inspired mostly by the East Carolina population. Give me suggestions and I just may write it. Otherwise, sit back and just wait for the rant that targets you.
2 comments:
1.) I bitched the other day about not being able to fold newspapers back and it makes me feel retarted and there is honestly one crumpled up right in fromt of my on my coffee table.
2.) the other day 2 homeless people in a span of 5 minutes asked me for money outside of the grocery store. one white woman tried to give me this really long story about how she's homeless and has no family and lost her job and blah blah blah, so of course i didnt listen or give her money, then a black man comes up to me and goes "yo man, can i get a dolla for a chicken biscuit at bojangles?" so of course i gave him the money...thats an honest black man that loves his bojangles.
3.) fuck those kids who drive like early 90s or 80s hondas that are "suped" up with your loud annoying exhaust and gay spoilers...why don't you spend that money to put paint on your car that doesnt look spraypainted or metal, or buy a nicer car in the first place?
- Anthony "Really Large Penis in Robin's Mouth" Errato
as the driver of an old 90s Honda... All i have to say is this:
*I have no Air Conditioner
*there is a large gaping hole in the bumper
*the fucking thing leaks oil, coolant, water, and any other Driveway staining substance every where it goes
*when it rains the hard top leaks water onto my passengers
*the hood is covered in rust and somehow has sun damage that leaves the paint in certian areas lighter than the rest of the car in a shape that vaguely resembles a peace sign.
*both fenders are severly dented and painted a wonderful shade of primer.
*the inside is not only infested with mildew, it smells like it too... (or perhaps that is the melted reeses peanut butter cup justin left in there last easter)
*and finally, it has been Broken down more than it has been Drivable for the past two years.
... no i didnt write this to vent my frustrations about my own car.. (well yea i guess I kinda did)... I jsut wanted to say, that on the days that the car is actually running, why?... DEAR GOD... why? do high school kids look at me and rev thier engine thinking I want to race!?!?
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