As I have recently been going to the beyond fitness on a regular basis now (thank god), I've been noticing things that go on there. I occasionally see people that we knew from highschool and try to look really sucked into my working out, so A. they won't notice and B. if they do notice, they'll think I'm too busy to talk. Because face it, we weren't really friends in highschool, why do I want to talk to you and pretend I care how the last year of your life went? I don't. Anyway... but what I see more often than kids from highschool are overly buff dudes, grunting and sweating up a storm.
First off...being so buff that you could lay your arm on me and it would pretty much knock me over, is gross. Having every muscle toned in your body is really disgusting. Not only is your skin wrapped so tightly around your bones and muscle, but your head looks disproportional to the rest of you. But anyway.. you konw if you choose to look like an ape.. thats all you, but don't come the gym grunting like one. No ones impressed that you can lift like 500 pounds with one arm, i would hope you could with muscles like that. Its seriously pathetic, I know I write a lot of posts about people trying to hard, but I had to do this one. These guys, and few girls (which is even grosser than guys being that buff) will get on these machines and theyll lift a lot of weight, but grunt while doing it, not in like a REAL straining away, more in a way to have people look at them, because then they proceed to slam their weights down as hard as they possibly can (which may be why half of the machines are broken!), and then look around, like looking to see if anyone noticed. I'm not kidding, I've witnessed this on several occasions.
Seriously, you're going to the gym, thats great.. helping America not look like the Michelin Man's cousin, but don't come to impress people or try to pick up girls who arent interested in your disgustingness.
On another note, not only do I not understand your want to look like an ape, but why do you have to wear little American Gladiator outfits. Maybe you are training for one of thats stupid competitions, but there is no need for you to come to the gym in your onesie spandex bikershorts attached to a tank top that doesnt even cover your nips. It makes me want to vomit, which actually might help me lose weight.. so hey.
Finally a note to the boys on the weight machine near what I call the "sex machines" or you know the ones you sit down at and you open and close your legs and works out the muscles in your thighs. Well I'd appreciate it if you stopped trying to look up my shorts when I'm working out, THANKS. Bastard.
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Fulfilling your daily requirement for cynicism, pessimism and sarcasm since 2006. Weekly rants inspired mostly by the East Carolina population. Give me suggestions and I just may write it. Otherwise, sit back and just wait for the rant that targets you.
11 comments:
look at me! im on steroids! my muscles are really big but my balls are really small! and yeah..what is up with those non-nip covering tanktops that look like a midget hung on it and stretched it down? oh...and if you were on the sex machine, id look down your shorts all day.
ps...whens that post you promised us coming? your blog is my bible..dont dissapoint me.
pps...youre a bitch.
- george
Which post? The one about highschool girls... i already did it, its the one below. Who is George is this Caitlin? I will attempt to not disappoint you, what post were you talking about? Thanks george :)
OHhh i know who george is thanks dude..
robin, do you recall that one beefy orange bald man who talked to me for like 30 minutes senior year. actually, i was on the "sex machine" that you mention in your post. well the first thing he said to me (as i was spreading wide open) was "well i guess youre just about the palest little thing ive ever seen!" or something along those lines. then he proceeded to tell me about his tanning bed experiences, and where to find the most decent ones in cary. then he further offended me by comparing his skin to the "ay-rabs" who work at beyond fitness, saying their skin is "real nice" but that he prefers his own "bronze", aka orange skin tone. its people like him that cause me to loathe the gym. oh and then theres the whole working out aspect.
i was talking about the post about people we knew in high school that still haven't grown up...aka people who either haven't gone to college or go to wake tech and still live with their parents, therefore still have the maturity of high school students and only hang out with people still in high school and are fucking losers. although i feel strongly about this, i would like to hear your opinion on this.
- Sir George Julius Hamsteadburger VI
if you direct your attention george to th epost in april callled "like do we really have to work" i kind of talk abou tthem at the bottom. but well see if i can come up with something :)
Atleast you go to a gym with young people. My fam joined Rex wellness center and its full of seniors working out. I got the enjoyment of an old guy's balls falling out the side of his gladiator out-fit. He was 90. I kid you not.
<3 Amanda M. {yes I do work out}
OMG THATS DISGUSTING AND KIND OF INTRIGUING! What did they look like!?
ok so this is off topic from the post, but on topic of the above comments. whats so wrong with people going to wake tech and living with their parents? i think our community especially looks down upon people who choose to go to wake tech, or just skip college altogether. this is why many of us dont make it past our first year, or dont stay at the university we originally choose. we are pressured into going to college because our society, and you too my little rooble booble, thinks everyone should. i think people should do whats best for them. i know plenty of people who go to college who are just as big of an asshole and just as immature as they were in high school. maturity comes with growing up, but not necessarily a college experience/education. look at our little mandar for example. she lives at home with her parents and goes to wake tech, and shes (surprisingly) probably the most mature and responsible one out of our little group of girls. so please dont include her into that group of athens assholes that sit around cary and leach off their parents. most of them lie about going to wake tech anyway.
well that was george that was saying wake tech morons.. *i stated in the post below about the girl that wake tech was cool with me, she was just failing* Yea I do think everyone should go to college, but if they dont that they should atleast be making some of their life. Like I give mad props to Drew because look at him he didnt go to school and hes successful. But its a lot of those boys I call losers that went to athens.. that are not doing anything besides leaching off their parents money and not even working, still walk around like they are hot shit *i saw one today and he was still doing his whole.. IM SOO FUCKING COOL attitude. so finally now a lot of them are realizing in my terms "we are fuck ups" so were gonna go join the army etc which will be good for them. So when i talk about the kids that didnt go to school im talking about them. I dont have BEEF with Wake Tech in teh slightest. I have beef with people who think they are cool but are idiots and are wasting everyones time and money. Like i heard robbie went to some school and is getting straight A's and he hung out with those kids.. so Props to robbie. but anyway id ont know where im going... basically all of those boys that Robbie was friends with minus Robs cus he was always nice, annoy me and i find them unintelligent and not worht my time and im not afraid to tell them that if htey try to approach me with their cocky attitude or ignore me cus Im not cool enough for them, like wha thappened today.. with the moron
George appologizes for stereotyping and calling out an entire demographic when he in fact was also ranting about a certain group of ADHS people who we all know.
- Georgypoocheerbabe674
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